Typing of the Dead Groups List

This list was generated from the Dreamcast version of Typing of the Dead. More details here.

All Typing of the Dead Lists: phrases, words, groups, 3+ characters, 3-letter words, 2-letter words, full list

Thoughtful questions

What does valentine’s day mean to you?

A romantic evening with your true love
Torment if you are single
Mind your own business

Describe the last movie that you saw:

It had lots of explosions and guns
A cartoon where animals sang badly
Tear jerking drama where everyone died

Describe your favorite food

Low calorie no fun healthy stuff
I had to catch it and bite its head off
Still chewing it right now

Describe the person next to you:

Goofy slacker who needs to get a life
My better half. My soulmate
Nobody is next to me because I stink

What is your favorite zoo animal?

I love the poop throwing monkeys
Watching the tigers eat too much meat
Personally, I prefer pachyderms

How do you feel about your family?

They’re a bunch of thieving pigs
Without them, I wouldn’t be here today
Dysfunctional, completely dysfunctional

An angry mob is chasing someone. You…

Rush immediately to help the person
Suddenly want to go for a haircut
Pick up a stick and join the mob

There’s smut on the ground, you…

Immediately burn it and go to church
Debate the vices of porn with a passerby
File it in your vast collection

You get an F on your report card, you?

Sue the publishers of your textbook
Leave the country and change your name
Blackmail your teacher and get an A

3 thugs approach you in an alley…

Run away like a scared little girl
Act crazy so they’ll leave you alone
Open up an econo sized can o’ whup ass

Your parents go on vacation, you…

Clean the house to make them happy
It’s time to have a raging party!
Snoop around the house for porn

By accident, you access an adult website

Heavens to Betsy! Oh the shame!
Bookmark it, categorize it, and file it
Who are we kidding, this was no accident

What is that eye crust in the morning?

It’s just some sand from the sand man
Evidence that aliens anally probed you
The start of a balanced breakfast!

On a 1st date, you need to fart, you…

Hold it until the end of the date
Run to the bathroom and let er rip
Unleash your magnificent bowels

Political Correctness…

Is an oxymoron!
Turns little words into big stupid ones
Oppresses everyone equally so it’s good

Your date has a booger, you…

Subtly rub your finger under your nose
Yell, “Oh crap! You got a booger!”
Don’t do anything. It’s kinda sexy!

Golf is…

An entertaining game based on skill
Really Demolition Derby in Golf Carts!
I’d say it’s seventeen holes too long

Worse than finding a worm in an apple…

Finding half of a worm
Discovering it in your mouth
Worms in your armpit!

How to tell if your dog is healthy

Lots of energy and a shiny coat
Eats like a horse and runs like a deer
He bites you hard and laughs

The hardest thing to do…

Eating tuna and doing 100 push ups
Waking up early without an alarm clock
Telling your father that you love him

You are most afraid of…

Giving a speech in front of a crowd
The boogie man who lives in your closet
Spiders Spiders Spiders Spiders Spiders

What do you look for in a mate?

Good looks and gullability
Sense of humor and lots of money
Brains and good hygiene

How would you rate this game?

Perfect 10, the best game ever!
6 out of 10, not bad I guess…
2 out of 10, I want my money back!

Where are you going after this?

Home to my loving family
Back home, to play videogames alone
I’m not going to answer that question

Pick your ideal boss

Someone who gives me lots of money!
A prankster with a whoopee cushion!
One who doesn’t see me come in late

What’s the biggest lie you’ve ever told?

They’re just… cold sores
You’re special, the only one for me
I got my degree from Harvard

Describe yourself as a child

Enjoyed pulling heads off of insects
Talked to imaginary friends all day
Believed parents were evil aliens

Things you love to hate:

Models your lover thinks are cute
Athletes who are stronger than you
The Emperor Boss in this game

Ways to make your mother cry:

Tell her you don’t love her
Say she’ll be a grandma soon
Chop onions under her nose

Reasons not to sit down:

There’s a wad of gum on the seat
No seat on your bike
You’ve recently been spanked

Things you do alone in bed:

Make a huge fort with sheets
Pretend you are in the hospital
Cuddle your teddy bear, Aww!

Another way to say ‘I love you’:

Leave flowers in the boudoir
Call a radio station and dedicate a song
Scream it in your date’s ear!

Ways to prove you like her friends?

Write thank you notes after every visit
Fix them an elaborate dinner
Hit on them shamelessly

Things to do when you’re bored:

Read that novel that you keep meaning to
Prank call the annoying people from work
Search for that one last missing sock

You know you’re a loser when…

You won’t give yourself your number
The teeth in your mouth go on strike
Nobody else likes you… Loser!

When you go to the beach, you like to:

Ogle the half nude bipeds around you
Lay in the sun and acquire skin cancer
Make sand castles and act like a giant!

When you look at the clouds, you see…

Big gigantic fuzzy animal shapes
Stratocumulus and cirrus clouds, duh
Nothing, been staring at the sun too

When you aren’t in an arcade, you…

Cruise for girls in your sportscar
Dress up your pets and party
Stay home and play more video games

What’s your goal in life?

I want to get rich and buy Europe
Take over the world and enslave humanity
Count the number of hairs in my armpit

How can you tell when your wife’s upset?

An uneasy silence, and cold glares
She keeps throwing furniture at me
When I woke up today my bed was on fire

What’s your ideal night out?

A quiet dinner and romantic movie
Burgers, beer and a monster truck rally
Ski masks, shotguns and a car chase

Why don’t you have a girlfriend yet?

What do you mean? I have a girlfriend!
Because I don’t particularly want one
Just leave me alone, Mom?

How many children would you want?

One, to save on time and money
Two, so they can keep each other company
Four, for tag team wrestling at home

Which kind of superpower would you want?

Invisibility, to save on clothing costs
Wings, to save on bus fare
Telepathy, to save on phone bills

You’re on a date, and you fart. You…

Apologize, and change the subject
Blame it on the person at the next table
Loudly accuse your date of passing gas

What would your autobiography be called?

My Journey to Nowhere in Particular
Adventure and Romance in the Big City
How to Be Evil and Get Away With It

Describe your fighting skills

Strong as a butterfly, fast as a sloth
Quick as an oyster, graceful as a rhino
Fierce as a koala, powerful as a bunny

If you kissed a frog, it’d turn into a

Prince, with a horse and castle
Doctor, with a sports car and mansion
Fashion model, with absolutely nothing

What’s pi?

Something about a circle and a ratio
A tasty pastry filled with some fruit
3.14159265358979323…

What would you risk for love?

My money, my work, my future, my life
Depends on the person, I guess…
Up to five dollars, no more than that

Would you walk alone in a dark alley?

Yes, I’m a black belt in 3 martial arts
I’m a world class sprinter, so I’d be OK
Of course! I mug people for a living!

Does this dress make me look fat?

Actually, the fat makes you look fat
Well, uh, what do you mean by fat?
I, um… AGH! My leg! Call an ambulance!

If the world was ending, you would…

Loot and pillage. Because, er, why not?
Park in a red zone. No one can stop me!
Keep playing this game. I’m almost done!

Why are you playing this game?

To practice typing so I can get a job
Just because I think zombies are cute
I thought it was House of the Dead 2

What do you want to be when you grow up?

A superhero. Or maybe a huge dragon
I don’t know. Something cool, though
Old. With a gut, and a lot less hair

How do you feel right now?

Fine, but my hands are really tired
My fingers are starting to cramp up
I’m nauseous, but I’m almost done!

What do you think of zombies?

Cute, in a warm and cuddly sort of way
Beautiful, in an avant garde sort of way
Attractive, in a nihilistic sort of way

How do you feel about your parents?

I wish they’d given me better genes
This question’s too personal, I think
Actually, my middle name is Oedipus

Do you get enough exercise?

I should run a few more laps every day
Every day, I play sports videogames
Absolutely yes… starting tomorrow

Which sport would you participate in?

Rugby, against a team of sumo wrestlers
Soccer, against a team of kickboxers
Water polo, against a team of sharks

What do you do to help the environment?

Try to conserve water by not bathing
Save electricity by living in the dark
I make my own electricity at home

What kind of soldier would you be?

Fighting valiantly on the front lines
Courageously hiding behind a large rock
Bravely running away as fast as possible

Which one would taste better?

Spaghetti with yogurt instead of sauce
Fresh fruit, ice cream and ground beef
Orange juice with cream and garlic

Which car would you rather drive?

Excellent acceleration, but no brakes
Great handling, but no steering wheel
Nice paint, but it’s on the windows too

Which game is the most annoying?

3 weeks of gameplay, 3 second ending
Crashes right before the final boss
Beautiful graphics, crappy controls

Do you like to live dangerously?

Yes, I take naps on railroad tracks
All my money is in Internet stocks
I’m always 100% honest with my wife

How do you know she’s the one for you?

I feel weak when she puts on a bikini!
We get along well, and have a lot of fun
She looked at me! She just looked at me!

What’s the best way to attract women?

Good clothes, good hair and a nice smile
Wear her clothes and look better in them
Drink a lot of beer and belch real loud

If you were an animal, you’d be a…

Vulture, looking for carrion to snack on
Rat, scurrying around kitchens for food
Dog, because fetch is a cool game

Describe your ideal summer vacation

Stranded on a beautiful Pacific island
Lost in the middle of an exotic jungle
Being a judge for a swimsuit competition

Jokes

The quick brown fox jumped over the
Lazy dog again and again and again
Until the dog got very angry and
Bit the fox’s ass.
One of my zombie friends failed his
First driver’s test last weekend.
Do you want to know why he failed?
He left his foot on the gas.
The zombies finally got a
Hockey Team together, but their
First game got called off.
There was a face off in the corner.
The other day, there were these
Two zombies eating a clown.
One zombie turns to the other and
Says, “Does this taste funny to you?”
What do you call a zombie taking a bath?
You call him Stew, of course.
How do you know if a zombie used
Your shower? The soap got bigger.
Did you know that if you finish
Typing this entire block of lines
That you will be completely
Dateless for the rest of your life?
It’s not kind to tap on the glass.
If you must, then please quickly pass.
If you cannot then I urge you at last
Run hither my friend before I pass gas!
With twisted fellows my urgency comes.
With hardened laughs you gaze unto me.
I lay my hand upon yours, my sweet, and
Let out the nastiest fart you’ll know.
Look there! What could it be?
Is it a man? I don’t think so.
Is it a woman? No, not that either.
Let’s wait to see what bathroom it uses.
Oblivious to my big brother,
I took on a decadent lover.
But when I came home, she wasn’t alone
They’d apparently discovered each other.
There once was a guy from the border.
Who fancied this girl. He adored her.
To catch her eye, he unzipped his fly
And now she’s got a restraining order.
Roses are red, Violets are blue
No wait… Violets aren’t blue,
Violets are Violet, not blue.
Sugar! what the hell rhymes with violet?
Once upon a time, I was in an elevator.
I just finished eating a plate of beans.
The urge was overwhelming…
Didn’t make any friends that day.
My job requires driving a fancy car.
People with their lights on follow me.
But I can usually lose them.
Before we get to the cemetery.
I think the skunk really gets a bad rap.
He’s nothing compared to the shark.
Maybe they’d get along together?
Perhaps they could have tea?
Alexander wasn’t so great.
Ivan wasn’t really so terrible.
You want to see something terrible?
Let me show you my sister.
There are some things in life
I just can’t seem to understand.
Like why do hot dogs come in packs of 10
And the buns come in packs of 8…
Something smells funny in here.
Can it be the gum on the floor?
Or is it the old fish in the corner?
It might also be me. I stink!
Sometimes I like to watch butterflies.
They flutter by, pulled by the wind.
I often wonder what they taste like.
Maybe they taste just like chicken.
Are you the devil’s spawn?
Cause you look really HOT!
Is your Mom a terrorist?
Cause, Baby, you’re the BOMB!
My feet kill me, when I walk a lot.
My eyes kill me, when I play games.
My head hurts me when I think.
I shouldn’t do anything. Ever.
Things are looking better.
If you look really closely,
Anyone can look sexy.
Thank goodness for make up.
There’s something fishy in my soup.
I dug in deeper for a better look
And was very surprised when my spoon
Looked right back at me.
I am always wet and sticky, and
When the lights go down,
Hundreds of people touch me,
Because I’m a floor in a movie theater.
Cultural differences are a farce.
Everyone is the same, underneath.
Especially underneath their clothes.
We all look funny naked.
My cat rolled off the bed.
My cat flew out the window.
I’m in love with my cat.
I don’t think I’m her type, though.
Forget hairspray nothing holds hair
Like good, old fashioned lard.
It holds my hair in place,
Nice and good oh yeah!
My mom… She won’t even talk about it.
So little did I know that on Halloween,
when I wore an alien costume,
She nearly passed out from fright.
There’s millions of us on a long trip.
We all have the same goal.
We’re traveling in a primordial goo.
Because we’re all germs in a sneeze.
Touching zombies is really disgusting.
It reminds me of when I was young.
I walked barefoot after it rained.
I stepped on two snails and a slug.
Picking scabs is my favorite past time.
It keeps me busy all day long.
It’s not the picking that excites me.
It’s seeing what’s growing underneath.
I hope this doesn’t freak you out.
The average adult has eaten 8 spiders.
Spiders like moist, dark, small, places,
Like your mouth when you are sleeping.
They say the early bird gets the worm.
Ideally, I like to sleep in until noon.
There isn’t really a whole lot you
Can do with a stupid worm, anyway.
On behalf of all zombies, I’d like to
Issue the following statement.
Typing doesn’t kill people.
But it seems to kill lots of zombies.
If I were a really curious chicken,
And there was an uncrossable road,
And the road was really dangerous,
I’d be too chicken to cross it.
You know when you lean back in a chair,
And the chair starts to fall backwards,
And you catch yourself before you fall?
I feel like that when I dance at a club.
There’s nothing funnier than getting
Into an elevator in a 50 story building,
Pressing every button on the panel,
And getting off on the second floor.
PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I YELL ALL THE TIME.
I TELL THEM THAT I AM NOT YELLING!!!
MY CAPS LOCK KEY IS STUCK .
I DON’T KNOW HOW TO FIX IT. SO THERE.
Everyone in the restaurant is confused.
The men are looking at the women.
The women are looking at the men.
I switched signs on the bathroom doors.
It’s a really really hot day today.
But nobody is swimming in the pool.
I don’t know why they aren’t swimming.
Maybe we should put water in the pool.
That funny little man is hopping.
Hopping up and down on one leg.
He seems very angry right now, because
I sewed one of his pant legs closed.
Which came first, the chicken or the egg
The egg couldn’t exist without a chicken
But the chicken had to come from an egg
Whatever, I like to eat both of them…
How come they say crazy people are nuts?
Everyone knows most nuts have shells.
People also try to get shy people to
Come out of their shells. Are they nuts?
My daddy is a plastic surgeon…
He makes really ugly people look pretty.
He makes old people look young again.
Mommy wishes that he’d work on himself.
I like when you reach into your pocket
And find a big wad of money.
It’s a lot better than reaching in and
Finding a big wad of used tissue.
I climbed to the top of a mountain.
I spoke to a very wise old man.
He told me the meaning of life…
But I can’t get down from the mountain.
One time at camp, I yawned and
This squishy bug flew in my mouth.
So I gave it a name. I named it gmbubu
Hard to talk with a bug in your mouth.
When I was just a little kid,
I asked my grandpa why he was bald.
His answer made a lot of sense. He said,
“Grandma gave me too many headaches.”
People who ride motorcycles always
Get a bunch of bugs in their teeth.
Why don’t spiders ride motorcycles?
They wouldn’t have to make those webs.
On my birthday, my dad got me a pinata.
It looked just like a bee hive.
I hit it and realized it wasn’t a pinata
My dad was really funny that way.
The kids down the street got in trouble.
I can’t stop laughing, because
I gave them a map of the cemetery, and
Told them it was for buried treasure.
I am really against people wearing fur.
Because of the slaughter of animals.
I am even more against fake fur.
Because they kill stuffed animals.
For my friend’s birthday present,
I mailed her a little bunny rabbit.
She was sad when she got it, because
I forgot to poke air holes in the box.
I just had my high school graduation.
At the end of the ceremony, I got happy.
I threw my cap in the air, and
When I looked up, it hit me in the eye.
These two guys walk into a bar.
The first guy looks at the second guy
And says, “You didn’t see it either?”
Get it? It was a metal bar! Ha Ha!
If you have a goose and add another,
You end up with some geese.
If you have a moose and add another,
Do you end up with some meese?
My face really hurts a lot today.
I guess it’s because I shaved.
But I couldn’t find my razor.
So I had to use a cheese grater.
Playing this game is quite fun.
No joystick or trackball or gun.
Typing with skill, many zombies you kill
But if not you had better just run!
There was an echidna from Vegas,
Whose hairstyle was loud and outrageous,
When asked by cops, why the dreadlocks
He told them the idea was Sega’s.
When told of his impending doom
The condemned man responded “How Soon?”
Could he decide while he was still alive
“A grave or an urn or a tomb?”
Here’s a bit of advice on dating.
When you first pick up a girl,
Take a look at her mom, because that’s
What she’ll look like when she’s older.
What do soccer playing zombies shout,
If they score against the opposing team
By getting the ball into the net?
GHOULLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!
You know what, people are like water.
Some are deep, others are shallow.
Some cause ripples, others waves.
Me, I just like to pull the plug.
Cannibalism is a crime against nature.
You never see chickens eat eggs.
You never see cows eat steak.
You never see lawyers eat snakes.
Brush your teeth! Wash your hands!
Do your homework! Go to school!
Find a job! Aren’t you married yet?
When will my mom leave me alone?
If I were a 2000 year old gambler, and
I was at the David vs. Goliath fight,
I would have bet on Goliath.
I still think that fight was fixed.
I have a brand new red sports car.
I keep it bright and shiny all the time.
I think I’ll just stand here next to it.
And wait for someone to notice me.
There are lots of predators in nature.
Lions hunt down and kill gazelle.
Sharks chase down sea lions and eat them
Kids with magnifying glasses burn ants.
How many times do I need to tell you?
I can’t believe you still don’t get it!
What part of this don’t you understand.
I just don’t want to return your money!
If only I were a little bit taller,
If only I were a little more handsome,
If only I could be a little funnier,
Then maybe I could be more confident.
If Little Johnny has ten dollars,
And buys two apples for $1 each,
And two $4 packs of cigarettes,
He’s going to be in deep trouble.
Use caution when pumping gasoline.
Turn off your engine. Do not smoke.
Do not operate the flamethrower
Without proper supervision.
You must find that beautiful woman.
The only clue is the size of her shoe.
Isn’t that a little risky, though?
Doesn’t anyone remember her face?
What would I do with 10 billion dollars?
I’d stand on top of a building, and
Throw away a million dollars every day.
I could keep doing that for 28 years!
Mommy, Brian just kicked me!
No I didn’t, Mark’s lying!
Mark, I told you not to lie.
And Brian, no more kicking.
I grew up speaking English and Swedish.
I learned German and Chinese in school.
I can speak Italian and Korean, too.
Why did I have to fall for a Frenchman?
Hello, thank you for calling 555 3928.
Your call is very important to us.
At the sound of the click and dial tone,
Please leave your name and message.
Lots of people work out at the gym,
But it’s such a waste of energy.
If gyms were hooked up to generators,
You could probably power a small city.
If I were smarter, I’d be a scholar.
If I were bigger, I could play football.
If I were faster, I could be a runner.
If I were any lazier, I’d be comatose.
My parents never let me play videogames.
When I grew up, I got a job at SEGA.
Now I’m a vice president, but every day
My Dad asks when I’m getting a real job.
We men will never understand women.
It’s not because we’re all that stupid
Or because we’re from different planets.
It’s just ‘cause women don’t want us to.
If women are always right,
And men are always wrong,
What happens if two women
Disagree about something?
Do you ever get out of the shower
And stand in front of the mirror?
You know, butt naked? Wet?
You don’t? Never mind.
A friend of mine hates to exercise.
She hates being tired and sweaty.
But she really enjoys swimming.
At least she’s not sweaty, she says.
Thank you for purchasing this product.
It has been manufactured and packaged
With the utmost care, so make sure
That you take good care of it.
Hi, what can I get for you today?
Okay, how about fries with that?
No? Are you on a diet or something?
It’s not going to do you any good.
I enjoy watching science fiction movies.
The people in them explore the galaxy.
They find exciting alien civilizations,
And then annihilate them with lasers.
Warning: This game may contain
Depictions of gore and violence.
If you are age 17 or younger,
Please play with your eyes closed.
In today’s news, the President
Announced the creation of
A new government committee
To review and rate swimsuits.
My brother has a comic book collection.
He says it’s worth a lot of money.
I bet he’ll be happy when he finds out
That I colored all the pictures for him.
Do you think I should buy this jacket?
It’s such a good deal! It’s 70% off!
I live in Hawaii and I’ll never wear it.
But for 70% off, I just have to buy it!
I don’t feel like watching TV.
I can’t concentrate on reading.
All I can do is just sit, and wait.
She said she would call… she said…
Uranium is an important material,
But its radiation can be dangerous.
Use caution when working with it,
And you probably shouldn’t lick it.
Hi, it’s me. Are you still mad at me?
How come you still won’t talk to me?
How on earth was I supposed to know
That girl I kissed was your sister?
Little Ms. Muffet sat on her tuffet
Eating her curds and whey
Along came a spider, he sat down besider
And she ate him for dessert!
I played a little joke on my cat.
I filled his litter box with quicksand.
I don’t know if my cat liked it.
I haven’t seen him in weeks.
What’s the difference between…
Neurotic people and psychotic people?
Neurotics build castles in the sky,
And psychotics live in them.
Chopping onions always makes me cry.
Every time the cleaver falls,
I am overcome with sadness.
That’s because I was raised by onions.
I got kicked out of the zoo yesterday.
Those zoo people have no sense of humor.
I went there with a good costume…
I was dressed as a hunter on safari.
I wonder which parent I look like,
I have my mother’s eyes, and
My father’s nose, and ears.
I keep them in a jar under my bed.
I shudder to think about my drink..
My friends were sharing, oh how caring,
But I wasn’t fast, now I’m the last
And 85% of the last sip is backwash.
People think I’m a weirdo.
I like to sit and think about stuff.
What would a chair look like if
Your knees bent the other way?
I think my dog is starting to get old.
My mom says that she’s still a puppy.
But my dog falls down all the time.
Especially when I try to ride her.
I had a nice picnic with my girlfriend.
We had plenty of really good food.
We had a really great time
Until the ants decided to eat her.
Jack isn’t so nimble, Jack ain’t quick
Jack tried to jump over the candle stick
Jack jumped high, the flames were higher
And now Jack just walks around them.
I still remember my first date,
But she never called me again.
I thought it went well, but I guess she
Didn’t like my ventriloquist’s dummy.
My dog was making noise all night long.
I don’t think he likes the neighbors.
They were throwing stuff at him.
I understand, he’s a bad piano player.
I don’t have to go shopping anymore.
I’ve been eating all kinds of poultry.
I just keep my sliding glass door clean.
And put the birdfeeder on the inside.
Some people told me my head was as hard
As a rock. I tried to prove them wrong.
So I hit my head with some rocks.
Now I can’t remember who they were.
You know, I used to like snakes.
They’re very cool, they slither around.
But one day, I went to the zoo.
And a bunch of them stole my car!
Aren’t dinosaurs really cool?
They lived a long time ago.
But no one knows how they died.
Maybe tar pits looked relaxing.
Why does he get all the women?
Is he that much better looking than me?
Is he that much funnier than me?
Oh, I get it, he’s their brother…
Why am I at work on a Saturday?
The sun’s out! Flowers are blooming!
Birds are chirping! The hills are green!
I should be home watching TV instead.
I see them in the park all the time.
Those sad silent clowns trapped in boxes
But you know, they talk to me.
Because I throw stuff at them.
I love school. I’m really popular!
I have a really awesome car!
I’m dating the head cheerleader.
You know you want to be me.
No, thank you, I don’t eat meat.
Fish? No, I really can’t eat fish.
I don’t like vegetables, either.
Anyway, don’t you have any chocolate?
Please, please I need your help!
I’ve been trapped in here for days.
I’m hungry and stinky right now…
Please get me out of this typing game!
I ate too much pizza, but it’s okay,
Because I went running this morning.
I think I’ll have 5 desserts, too,
I’m hungry… so very hungry…
I’m too hungry to cook anything.
I’m too hungry to go out for food.
Here kitty kitty kitty…
My brother always gives me presents.
Birthdays, holidays, and sometimes
For absolutely no apparent reason.
I wonder what he’ll steal next?
I really love wrestling practice.
I’m not officially on the team yet.
But I practice a lot at the mall.
Clotheslining people on the escalators.
Thinking of raisins makes me smile.
They are so small and wrinkled.
I get so happy when I think of them.
They remind me of grandma in a bikini.
I think I’ll sit by my huge pool,
Drive my gold plated sports car,
And prank call my old boss.
Stock options have been very good to me.
Jack and Jill went up the hill,
To settle a little dispute…
Jack fell down, and broke his crown,
And Jill got 5 years for assault.
Why does everyone have a cell phone?
It’s like they’re on an electronic leash
I don’t carry a cell phone, but I
Make sure my wife always has hers.
The other day, I saw this anteater.
He was really really overweight.
And then I started to wonder what
It would eat if it was on a diet.
At school, the kids make fun of me.
I just stopped eating globs of paste.
I also just stopped wetting the bed too.
Good thing I graduate next week.
See my lovely girlfriend put me in a box
See her put swords through the box.
There’s a problem, she’s not a magician.
I think I need to go see a doctor!
I think I’m going to quit my job.
I can’t hear that well anymore.
My chest and stomach hurt a lot.
Testing bullet proof vests isn’t fun.
I must be the unluckiest vampire ever.
I never should have gotten married.
My wife got mad at me and replaced
My coffin with a tanning booth.
Oh, how I love eating Birthday Cake,
But sometimes the cake burns my mouth.
I guess I should wait until it cools off
Or blow the candles out before I eat it.
Is there a reason my stomach is queasy?
The answer to this question isn’t easy.
Maybe it was the eggs with peanut butter
Or the hot fudge anchovy milkshake.
2 story newer home in nice area,
With 4 bedrooms and 2 baths.
Features sunny patio, new kitchen,
And a fully equipped dungeon below.
I’m too shy to talk to her in real life,
But at night, I can dream about her…
That’s only when I’m lucky, though.
Other nights, I dream of crazed monkeys.
No finance charges will be incurred
And no minimum monthly payment is needed
If you pay the full amount up front,
And give us your car and house and kids.
The standard maintenance plan
For your new car covers any damage
For 60 months, 60,000 miles, or
Until Friday, whichever comes first.
Job requirements: College degree,
Excellent communication skills,
And extensive experience with
Flattery, gossip and backstabbing.
When you’re walking down the street
And recognize someone you know,
It’s hard to tell when to say hi…
Especially if you’re near sighted.
If I ever get married, I want to find
Someone raised by a single father.
At least that would save me the trouble
Of wanting my mother in law dead.
I wish the voices in my head
Would just leave me alone!
Except for the one that tells me
The answers to my history tests.
If ancient Greek gods were alive today,
What would they do for a living?
Maybe Hermes could be a bike messenger.
Maybe Zeus could be an electrician.
To the eyes, my family don’t please.
We had our last reunion at the zoo.
The monkeys came down from the trees.
And I couldn’t tell who was who.
I think candy sprinkles are the best!
I bring them to the beach with me.
I like to throw them at sunbathers.
Because they stick to sun tan lotion.
She loves me, she loves me not.
She loves me. Yes! She loves me not. Aww
She loves me! Yes! She loves me!
Oh, look what I’ve done to the spider!
I was disgusted yesterday at breakfast.
I was on my last piece of raisin toast,
When I made a startling discovery.
I wasn’t eating raisin bread.
Have you ever thought about cloning?
Wouldn’t it be neat to have a clone?
There’d only be one problem though.
Which one would pay for the milk?
Wow, look at that train over there.
It’s coming really really fast and loud.
But my foot’s stuck on the track.
Goodbye! Tell my mom that I loved her!
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king’s horses and all of his men
Had a huge breakfast that morning.
I call for help, but they can’t hear me.
I’m stuck in this box. I can’t get out.
I’m starting to wish that I didn’t
Quit mime school after the first day.

Quick questions

Which is a State in the US?

Alabama
Florida
Georgia
Hawaii
Louisiana
Montana
New York
Tennessee
Organ
Africa
Boston
Confusion
Del Monte
Euphoria
Indigo
Pencilvainya
Weird Island
South Kansas

Which is a symptom of death?

Buried
Decomposing
Foul odors
In a coffin
No pulse
Quit breathing
Rotting smell
Rigor mortis
Achy bones
Crazy relatives
Extra cheese
Great cook
Huge appetite
Jamaican accent
Lives in Miami
Pink eye
Sugar coated
Ticklish

Which is a class in school?

Algebra
Biology
German
English
Geometry
History
Trigonometry
Spanish
Daydreaming
Faking injuries
Igloo Building
Taxidermy
Freudian Math
Liposuction
Cheerleading
Playing Hookey
Oral Hygiene
Zits 101

Which one is a spice?

Chili powder
Cinnamon
Nutmeg
Oregano
Paprika
Pepper
Rosemary
Some basil
Antacid tablet
Bacon fat
Deodorant
Ear wax
Fish food
Gopher guts
Lemon seeds
Maggots
Tasteless jokes
Yucky bugs

Which one is Christmasy?

8 reindeer
Christmas Trees
Egg nog
Jingle Bells
Jolly fat guy
Ornaments
Presents
Santa Claus
4 Horsemen
3 Wise guys
Angles
Bunnies
Greek Mythology
Dead Monkeys
Idiots
New Year’s Eve
Santa Monica
Thanksgiving

Which is a holiday in the US?

Arbory Day
Christmas
Columbus Day
Easter Sunday
Father’s Day
Mother’s Day
President’s Day
Thanksgiving
Back to School Night
Donkey Day
Great Thursday
Judgment Day
Not this one
Spanksgiving
White Flower Day
X Mash
Your hair is on fire
Zabberday

Which has exactly 4 legs?

2 people
Buffalo
Cheetah
A table
Elephant
2 vultures
A chair
Iguana
Flamingo
Jumping bean
Killer bee
Millipede
Nurse shark
Octopus
Python
Tarantula
3 people
Vampire bat

Which one is a dog?

Beagle
Bulldog
Collie
Dalmatian
Great Dane
Irish Setter
Pit Bull
Rottweiler
Angry Mailman
Eager Beaver
Frankfurter
Hot Dog
Juju Dog
Kalamari
Leopard
Mustang
Ostrich
Yummy Yummy

Which one lives underwater?

Blue whale
Dolphin
Electric eel
Giant clam
Lobster
Octopus
Piranha
Moray eel
20,000 gallons
Albatross
Cockroaches
Fish sticks
I can’t swim
Jelly
Queen bees
Sea gulls
Tuna sandwich
Yellow boats

Which is a type of fish?

Angel
Cat
Dog
Gold
Jelly
Lung
Monk
Sword
Bubble
Elevator
Fork
Hello
Image
Pounce
Quid
Rival
Trip
Zealous

You eat this with your hands

Bagel
Chocolate bar
Croissant
Energy bar
Gooseberry
Hamburger
Hot Dogs
Ice cream cone
Applesauce
Fettuccine
Juice
Live scorpions
Minestrone soup
Nasal spray
Pineapple juice
Rare steak
Spinach soup
Water

Who’d make a good date?

Boy next door
Cute girl
Nice guy
Girl next door
Hunky guy
Hottie
Spokesmodels
Supermodels
Dead grandma
Father dear
Jail bait
The Boogeyman
Little sister
A serial killer
Older brother
Zombie
Uncle Ted
Your momma

Which is a sign of Vampirism?

Bloodthirsty
Coffin bed
Fanged smile
Immortal
No reflection
Nocturnal
Pale skin
You’re a bat
Annoying cough
Drinks coffee
Excess hair
Goes picnicking
Tepid hands
Loves Garlic
Morning jogs
Sunbathes often
Tap dances good
Oily hair

Which rhymes with grave?

Behave
Cave
Crave
Dave
Gave
Knave
Pave
Wave
Avenue
Evade
Have
Joke
Leave
Slav
Olive
Quiver
Reeve
Starve

Which one is noisy?

Arcades
Hungry Baby
Chihuahua
Chinese Opera
Scolding Mom
Snoring Husband
Traffic Jams
Typing School
Baking a cake
Dropping clothes
Eating Jelly
Fighting mimes
Lazy slugs
Marching ants
Monastery
Nightfall
Raising a smile
Vacuum tube

Which one is stinky?

Dirty feet
Fish heads
Gasoline
Halitosis
Jock strap
Monk fish
Old eggs
Nuoc mam
Bar mitzvah
Cacophony
Endeavor
Insolence
Languor
Necessities
Pilgrimage
Restitution
Sanguine
Yearling

Find the Constellation

Aquarius
Big Dipper
Capricorn
Gemini
Orion
Sagittarius
Scorpio
Virgo
Dig Dipper
Elephant
Flatulence
Halitosis
Indigestion
Jack O’ Lantern
King Uranus
Little Dripper
Pig Dipper
Tiny Dipper

Which one is a tasty beverage?

Apple juice
Cow’s milk
Ginger ale
Iced tea
Lemonade
Orange juice
Root beer
Soda pop
Bacon grease
Deadly poison
Fish guts
Ham juice
Juicy larvae
Milt
Nostril oil
Testosterone
Venomade
Water pressure

Which is an animal noise?

Bark
Howl
Meow
Moo
Oink
Quack
Ribbit
Woof
Ants
Creek
Dolphin
Rabbit
Fowl
Geese
Joker
Llama
Poodle
Zebra

Which one is hot?

Fire
Flames
Hell
Lava
Magma
Steam
The sun
Volcano
Asbestos
Baking soda
Cheese
Dry leaves
Eire
No water
Perfume
Quick
Red shoe
Umbrella

Which one is cold?

Blizzards
Frost
Frozen food
Glaciers
Ice cream
Icicles
North Pole
Snow
Cold medicine
Dry towels
Every summer
A fever
Jackets
Lice
Oil lamps
Hawaiian Winter
Rain coats
Umbrellas

Which one is 5 letters long?

Angel
Basic
Chill
Eight
Kings
Seven
Vague
Waste
Dig
Five
Ghosts
Hiccup
Icky
Jackson
Lose
Maze
Nickel
Ten

Which rhymes with through?

Blue
Flu
Knew
Moo
New
Stew
Yahoo
Zoo
Cough
Dough
Enough
Ghost
Jewel
Loathe
Ouch
Rough
Thorough
Vogue

Which contains the word “no”?

Albino
Dinosaur
Gnome
Knot
Know
North
Nothing
Snot
Blow
Cloud
Elbow
Phone
Trombone
Home
Ion
Loan
Moan
Open

Which is a human body part?

Arms
Chest
Eyes
Feet
Head
Legs
Neck
Nose
Beasts
Itchy
Gills
Kilt
Mammals
Public
Reef
Tentacles
Virginia
Jawbreaker

Which word has 2 m’s in it?

Immigration
Marshmallow
Memorial
Memory
Mushroom
Remember
Swimming
Yummy
Animal
Bunny
Come
Damn
Frame
Gambling
Human
Lame
Permanent
Vampire

Which word has 2 N’s in it?

Androgynous
Banana
Cannibal
Hunting
Known
Singing
Spanking
Winning
Danger
Engage
Fence
Gain
Interest
Jinx
Losing
Mustang
Neither
Open

Which one is an insect?

Butterfly
Cricket
Dung beetle
Grasshopper
Horse fly
Mosquito
Potato bug
Praying mantis
Arachnids
Epidermis
Flying fish
Ziggly wiggly
Lone wolf
Nightingale
Raving lunatic
Sweet potato
Tomato paste
Yellow teeth

Which is in the bread group?

Banana bread
Flapjacks
French toast
Garlic bread
Muffins
Oatmeal
Raisin bread
Waffles
Apricots
Catsup
Dalmatians
Egg yolks
Honey mustard
Lima beans
Nourish
Potatoes
Strawberry jam
Turnips

Which is change for a dollar in US?

100 pennies
4 quarters
Ten dimes
2 half dollars
20 nickels
10 dimes
Two half dollars
Twenty nickels
Four quarts
50 pennies
31 nickels
75 pennies
80 dimes
9 dimes, 11 cents
Eight quarters
Half dollars
6 nickels, 6 dimes
Six dimes, 4 nuts

Which do you find on sushi?

Eel
Octopus
Salmon
Shrimp
Snapper
Squid
Tuna
Wasabi
Apples
Bacon
Croutons
Dandruff
Giraffe
Hamsters
Jelly
Ketchup
Peanuts
Raw pork

What’s in a normal sandwich?

Jelly
Mustard
Ham
Pastrami
Salami
Lettuce
Onion
Pickles
Breed
Charcoal
Gravel
Ice
Jellyfish
Kerosene
Noodles
Roast beets
Texas
Water

Which country is in Europe?

Belgium
Britain
Denmark
Finland
France
Germany
Italy
Spain
Arcadia
Canada
Egypt
Japan
Laputa
Mexico
Paris
Quebec
Rome
Vermont

You can drive here from Texas

Mexico
Maine
Montana
Chile
Colorado
Canada
Brazil
Bolivia
Hawaii
Australia
China
France
Germany
Russia
Tibet
Shanghai
India
Jakarta

Who was King of England?

Henry
Edward
George
James
William
Boris
Clayton
Frank
Keith
Mickey
Nicolai
Pierre
Roberto
Scott
Teddy

What CAN’T you buy at a store?

Belgium
Body parts
Children
Citizenship
Endurance
Land mines
Plutonium
True love
Diapers
Fiberglass
Jackhammer
Medicine
Natural gas
Shotgun
Groceries
Underwire bra
Yellow shirts
Watermelons

Which can you play with mom?

4 Square
Backgammon
Frisbee
Gin Rummy
Go Fish
Marbles
Bingo
Video games
Angry Games
Chicken
Deadly Games
Brushing shoes
Jealous games
Reindeer games
Spin the Bottle
Kiss chase
Truth or Dare
Wicked games

Which is a disastrous thing?

Hurricane
Car crash
Disaster
Earthquake
Flaming death
Hazardous
Tornado
Twister
Big hugs
Gifted
Imminent
Jubilant
Korea
Masking
Neophyte
Roughage
Vladimir
Zoology

Which food is messy?

Apple pie
Chili fries
Grapefruit
Hamburger
Mangoes
Mu shu pork
Oranges
Sloppy Joe
Brazil nut
Diaper rash
Energy bar
Junipers
Noiseless
Pennies
Quarters
Rasputin
Tennyson
Underwear

Something not to tell her folks

Go away
Hot mama
I’m dying
It’s infected
Let’s flirt
Marry me
She’s hot
You suck
All right
Believe me
Cook this
Delicious!
Elegance
Forget it
Just me
Not here
Try me
Why not?

Something to do before you go to bed

Brush teeth
Drink milk
Fluff pillows
Kiss wife
Read a book
Wear pajamas
Take a shower
Yawn a lot
Act silly
Clear throat
Exorcise ghost
Get crazy
Hold meetings
Invent wheel
Make statues
Order food
Play dead
Quit dieting

Something adults have to do

Breathe
Consume
Poop
Grow
Sleep
Shower
Taxes
Pee
Applicate
Elevate
Fortuous
Ignore
Minotaur
Nullify
Ordain
Underwear
Quantify
Warrantee

Name the girlie thing

Cosmetics
Dresses
Gossip
Manicure
Jewelry
Child birth
Purses
Stockings
Big trucks
Free weights
Nightmares
Oysters
Questions
Rescue aid
Termination
Atrophy
Unworthy
Young larvae

What is a good vacation spot?

Beach
Europe
Hawaii
Island
Italy
Bali
Ski resort
Theme park
A truck stop
Cemetery
Dad’s House
Friday
Mausoleum
Old folks’ home
Police station
Rest home
Under the bed
War Zone

How do you make people like you?

Agree
Cook
Give
Help
Kiss
Listen
Share
Smile
Bump
Dump
Eat them
Maul
Nerd
Order
Reek
Scream
Twist
Sleep

A kid’s fort would be made of

Cardboard
Boxes
Pillows
Sheets
Sticks
Tent
Tree
Wood
Ants
Dead animals
Eggs
Gravy
Hair
Lunch
Mucous
Neighbors
Underwear
Fish sticks

Something that’ll make a cat happy

Feed it
Love it
Mouse
Pet it
Play
Cream
Stroke it
Tuna fish
Shout at it
Bathe it
Catch it
Dump it
Evade it
Grab its tail
Ignore it
Kick it
Frown at it
Wax it

What thing will impress a woman?

Eloquence
Gentleman
Humor
Knowledge
Listening
Romance
Valiance
Valor
Arguing
Being a bore
Chauvinism
Dorkiness
Foolishness
Ignorance
Jealousy
Malice
Piggishness
Spit

Something that will help ease a cold?

Chicken soup
Drinking water
Medicine
Good sleep
Hot bath
Lots of rest
Vitamin C
Warmth
Animosity
Baking soda
Exorcism
Flossing
Interrogation
Junk food
New girlfriend
Orange paint
Pig’s feet
Torture

A kind of water

Filtered
Holy
Lake
Ocean
Puddle
Rain
Strait
Tepid
Animal
Beefy
Candid
Destitute
Glass
Jolly
Molasses
Nouveau
Quick
Wiggy

Which one is considered “junk food”?

Apple Pie
Banana Split
Candy Bars
Chocolate cake
Burger
Curly fries
Doughnuts
Hot dog
Energy bar
French Toast
Green Salad
Celery
Persimmons
Orange juice
Protein Shake
Ravioli
Tofu dog
Watermelon

Which is a girl’s name?

Frederica
Cheryl
Victoria
Barbara
Theresa
Anastasia
Samantha
Jolene
Norbert
Oliver
Wendell
Harold
Leonardo
Derrick
Xavier
Maverick
Emil
Rover

Which is a boy’s name?

Stephen
Franklin
Peter
Dylan
Abraham
Rafael
Manuel
Victor
Barbie
Eloise
Jacquelyn
Emily
Elizabeth
Gwyneth
Cathryn
Toni
Olivia
candy

Which would you tell your dog?

Roll over
Catch
Fetch
Jump up
Play dead
Shake
Stand
Speak
Act Macho
Bury Grandpa
Nullify
Grow thumbs
Be cool
Ignore me
Do homework
Make dinner
Quit dieting
Type fast

Which is a mode of transport?

Automobile
Airplane
Expensive Yacht
Harrier Jet
Horse
Magic Carpet
Speedboat
Submarine
Buffalo Wings
Crazy Monkeys
Dead horse
Goat cheese
Old People
Penguin
Rocking Horse
Toy plane
Jumping beans
Windmill

Something you can do naked

Bathe
Swim
Eat
Cook
Shower
Lounge
Dance
Shave
Victim
Taurus
Jelly
Mango
After
Nafta
Giraffe
Fibula
Raw fish
Organ

Which is a dinosaur?

Allosaurus
Ankylosaurus
Apatosaurus
Dimetrodon
Stegosaurus
Triceratops
Tyrannosaurus rex
Velociraptor
Bigassraptor
Bronchitis
Canker sore
Crude oil
Extinctosaurus
Fruityosaurus
Giantosaurus
Ivysaurus
Meatosaurus
Plantosaurus

Which is a Greek God?

Aphrodite
Apollo
Ares
Artemis
Athena
Morpheus
Poseidon
Zeus
Cupid
Gyros
Herpes
President
Elroy
Caesar
Taurus
Uranus
Nero
Xenia

Which animal is poisonous?

Black Widow
Gila Monster
Jellyfish
King Cobra
Rattlesnake
Scorpion
Tarantula
Yellow Jacket
Antelope
Caucasians
Dead Adder
Ex girlfriend
Hedgehog
Mother in law
Puffed Fish
Vampire Bat
Iguana
Lobster
Find the important car part:
Air bag
Brake pads
Bumper
Engine
Head lights
Radiator
Seat belt
Steering wheel
Cell phone
Deodorant
Flashlight
Garage
Jackhammer
Magnet
Ornament
Pit stop
Travel map
Wrench

Which would you BBQ?

Beef ribs
Chicken
Chicken legs
Filet mignon
Salmon
Sea bass
Shish kebabs
Steak
Aunt Judy
Ice cream
Lettuce
Peanut butter
Road kill
Tires
Watermelon
Yogurt
Mailman
Nachos

Which is a round fruit?

Cantaloupe
Cherry
Tangerines
Cranberries
Grapefruit
Orange
Tomato
Grapes
Apple pie
Banana
Flounder
Honey bees
Lettuce
Mushroom
Peach ice cream
Relish
Easter egg
Zucchini

Which can’t fly far?

Lemmings
Flying fish
Flying squirrel
Ostrich
Penguin
Platypus
Turkey
Turtles
Albatross
Butterfly
Dragonfly
Eagle
Horse fly
Canaries
Mosquito
Ravens
Sea gull
Vulture

Which is in the 3 Little Pigs?

3 pigs
Big bad wolf
Blowing
Brick house
Huff & puff
Stick house
Straw house
3 little pigs
2 German kids
5 bears
An old shoe
Cement store
Evil witch
Gingerbread
Lumberjack
Mu shu pork
Porridge
Red Riding Hood

Which contains wood?

A baseball bat
A catapult
A stagecoach
A wooden plank
Oak furniture
A cherry tree
Pirate ships
Pine trees
Cherry pie
Bored people
Dried fungus
Frozen ape men
Jack O’ Lanterns
Minerals
Rotten eggs
Stolen radios
Vitamins
Woodpecker

Which is best served cold?

A plate of sushi
Banana split
Caesar salad
Champagne
Ice cream
Iced tea
Lemonade
Vanilla yogurt
French fries
Green mucus
Hamburgers
Jail bait
New York Steak
Polish sausage
Ravioli
Spaghetti
Tater tots
Underpants

Which one is a planet?

Earth
Jupiter
Mercury
Neptune
Pluto
Saturn
Uranus
Venus
Andromeda
Black Hole
Comet
Fidelity
Gyro
Xanthippe
Light Years
October
Quasar
Zeus

Which breathes air?

Alligators
Elephant
Iguana
Killer whale
Manatee
Sea lion
Sea otter
Sperm whale
Catfish
Dead human
Fetus
Guppies
Jellyfish
Nurse shark
Octopus
Mannequin
Whale shark
Zombies

Which lays eggs?

Alligator
Chickens
Crocodile
Ostrich
Penguins
Platypus
Python
Sea turtles
Elephants
Gander
Hind
Jackal
Kangaroo
Llama
Rooster
Mouse
Timber wolf
Dalmatian

Which word is an adjective?

Asymmetrical
Bluish green
Bodacious
Brownish green
Deranged
Abysmal
Therapeutic
Transparent
Chlorophyll
Everyone
Flatulence
Hamburger
Incredibly
Masticating
Narcissism
Sanctuary
Super humanly
Vociferously

Which one floats?

A battleship
An oil slick
A lifejacket
A destroyer
An innertube
Bubbles
Ice Cubes
A fat dog
Cement Shoes
Dirty anchor
Easter eggs
Horse shoes
Large weights
Rocks
Sunken Ships
Treasure Chests
Ugly rocks
Wyoming

Which one bounces?

Baby boy
Balloons
Baseball
Basketball
Rubber ball
Rubber eraser
Man on the moon
Soccer ball
Apple pie
Crystal
Dirty underwear
Goose eggs
A sheet of glass
Intestines
A block of lard
A hod of bricks
Vegetable oil
Wet noodles

Which one rolls?

Ball bearings
Baseball
Basketball
Bowling ball
Domestic dogs
Boiled eggs
Brown stones
Your tongue
Fire
Jelly fish
Marmalade
Omelet
Pancakes
Pyramids
Rectangles
Triangles
Pendulum
Afghanistan

Which one is sticky?

A loogie
A pot of honey
Chewing gum
Paste
Seeping wound
Tape
Toothpaste
Used tissues
Bar soap
Feathers
Hiccups
Icicles
Lightning
Rocks
Dried Fish
Greased Pigs
A lot of zebras
Hyper Children

Which one decomposes?

A dead body
Dead fish
Dead musicians
Dog poop
Crab salad
Rotting meat
Tuna casserole
Zombies
Boulders
Mummy
Fossils
Glass eyes
Honey
Minerals
Plastic bags
Skeletons
Water
Yellow rocks

Which one has fingers?

Chimps
Doctors
Gloves
Gorillas
Humans
Lizards
Monkeys
Your mom
Albatross
Buffalo
Fingers
Killer bees
Nice penguins
Orphaned goats
Pig’s feet
Quail
Rhinoceros
Sea gulls

Which is sharp?

Broadsword
Broken glass
Cheddar cheese
Kitchen knife
Knives
Needles
Spears
Throwing stars
A dull axe
Rubber spears
Dull swords
Gaping wounds
Hot peppers
Loaded guns
Mayonnaise
Open sores
Ugly ducklings
Watermelons

Which is edible?

Fried zucchini
Frozen bananas
Nectarines
Raviolis
Rigatoni
Salty pretzels
Sesame seeds
Watermelon
Apple trees
Berry bushes
Cheesy jokes
Duck and cover
Egg shells
Goose bumps
Hog dung
Maple leaves
Orange paint
Pumpkin patch

Which one is alive?

Deadly snakes
Deadly virus
Goldfish
Green beans
Growing boys
Jumping beans
Undertaker
Watermelons
Apple turnovers
Baby diapers
Chicken livers
Elephantiasis
Fish heads
Human remains
Monkey business
Petrified trees
Running faucet
Sea breezes

Which one has legs?

Chair
Cheetahs
Chickens
Children
Frogs
Pants
Salamanders
Table
A chicken salad
Bacteria
Dirty fish
Goldfish
Jack in the box
Llama’s head
Maggots
Octopus
Rotten salad
Worms

Which makes you nauseous?

Castor oil
Eating raw pork
Getting seasick
Reading in cars
Roller coasters
Smelling vomit
Spinning around
The stomach flu
Dopamine
Funny jokes
Asinine quizzes
Belligerence
Helium balloons
Lemonade
Manhole covers
Nasty rumors
Organ concerts
Wet noodles

What’s bigger than a bread box

A bakery
An oven
A baker
Automobiles
A refrigerator
A kitchen
A beach ball
California
1 muffin
Bread
French roll
Moldy bread
Old bread
Rye bread
Soggy bread
Toasted bread
Wheat bread
Yeast infection

Which food is cooked?

Apple turnover
Banana bread
Cheese omelets
Cheesecake
Chicken fajita
Chicken salad
Hamburgers
Raisin bread
Dried fruit
Fruit salad
Green salad
Ice cream
Lettuce
Milkshake
Pickles
Sushi
Watermelon
Yogurt

Which one is a plant?

Apple trees
Asparagus
Birch tree
Broccoli
Chrysanthemum
Daffodils
Hibiscus
Tiger lily
Family tree
Gorgonzola
Iguana
Lycanthropic
Marshmallow
Neptune
Opossum
Shoe tree
Ugly whales
Weird smell

Which concerns pirates?

Buried Treasure
Cannons
Cutlasses
Parrots
Peg Legs
Scurvy
The Jolly Roger
Walk the plank
A tax write off
Daddy long legs
Electrolysis
Furniture sales
Going jogging
Hand Grenades
Milking cows
Vegetarians
Yellow beards
Leisure suits

Which grows on trees?

Apples
Bananas
Cherries
Leaves
Lemons
Peaches
Pears
Pinecones
Dandruff
Elephant
Fleas
Grapes
Heavy rains
Jumping freaks
Money
Ornaments
Rhymes
Watermelons

Which drinks blood?

Dracula
Fleas
Ghouls
Green Leeches
Leeches
Mosquitoes
Ticks
Vampire Bats
Anemia
Baseball bats
Crows
Easter Bunny
Hypothermia
Ice cream
Nice Lawyers
Politicians
Walruses
Your mom

Which one has bones?

A field mouse
A human
A skeleton
Brown bears
Dead skunks
Flounders
Monitor lizard
Your head
Chocolate cake
Enamel
Ghosts
Hamburgers
Jellyfish
Killer bees
Lasagna
Radiation
Marshmallow
Televisions

Which one can swim?

Sea snakes
Octopi
Penguins
Polar bears
Sea lions
Some dogs
Some people
Whales
Anchors
Beach balls
Catfish gumbo
Dead fish
Goose chase
Heavy weights
Tuna Sandwich
Lemmings
Maggots
Fish fillet

What can’t you do alone?

Brag about your salary
Break up with your friend
Stand in line
Live in a commune
Converse
Fight with John
Play hide and seek
Wear his and her t shirts
Shadowbox
Eat garlic toast
Head for the hills
Work out
Nibble as you cook
Go to church
Rush to the door
Take a cold shower
Weep with joy
Give birth

Which one is typically a gas?

Carbon dioxide
Ozone
Helium
Hydrogen
Nitrogen
Nitrous Oxide
Oxygen
Steam
Aquarium
Barometer
Dogma
Gasoline
Liquid Nitrogen
Mercury
Petroleum Jelly
Rayon
Testosterone
Unleaded Gas

Which one is sweet?

Chocolate
Cake
Gum
Candy
Ice cream
Lollipop
Soda
Sugar
Broccoli
Drinking water
Fried Chicken
Hot dogs
A lemon
Metal
Prune Juice
Toilet Water
Yeast
Zucchini
Which rhymes with “go?”
Although
Bureau
Thoreau
Afterglow
Burrow
Thorough
Throw
Very low
Rough
Sloth
How now
Old sow
Drought
Enough
Luau
Cough
Frown
Owen

Who was born first?

Cleopatra
Ghengis Khan
Henry VIII
Joan Of Arc
Julius Caesar
Shakespeare
Socrates
Tutankhamen
Abe Lincoln
Einstein
Ben Franklin
Fidel Castro
Mother Teresa
Your Mom
Pocahontas
Richard Nixon
Dracula
Washington

Which is in a music store?

Cello
Flute
Guitar
Harmonica
Piano
Trombone
Trumpet
Violin
Abacus
Blender
Drumstick bones
Eggbeaters
Jackhammer
Karate books
Lemmings
Monks
Sexy phone
Vacuum Cleaner

Which is Chinese food?

Egg Rolls
Hunan Beef
Hunan Chicken
Hunan Fish
Mu Shu Chicken
Mu Shu Pork
Sesame Chicken
Szechwan Beef
Acid Egg Roll
Belgian Waffle
California Roll
Denver Omelet
French Toast
Kung Pao Roach
Peking Dork
Turkey Burger
Wonton Juice
Yang Chow Lice

Which is breakfast food?

Denver Omelet
Doughnut
Ham and Eggs
Hash Browns
Muffins
Oatmeal
Omelets
Waffles
Asbestos Soup
Belgian Waddle
Cereal Killer
Eggs Interdict
French Toad
Grape Porridge
Grilled Spleen
Panned Cakes
Scrambled Legs
Toasted Slugs

Which is a good salad?

3 Bean Salad
Caesar Salad
Chef Salad
Chicken Salad
Egg Salad
Shrimp Salad
Spinach Salad
Tuna Salad
Butterfly Salad
Dustbunny Salad
Fruit Fly Salad
Goat Head Salad
Hamster Salad
Krabby Salad
Macarena Salad
Pinetree Salad
Raw Meat Salad
Wax Salad

Which is good for underwear?

Cotton
100% Silk
100% Cotton
Cotton blend
100% Satin
Burlap
Duct tape
Fish scales
Glass shards
Human bones
Poison Ivy
Roadkill
Sandpaper
Tacks
Wet concrete

Similar things

Molly
Holly
Ally
Elly
Polly
Rolly
Sally
Kelly
Nelly
Dolly
Monica
Sandra
Julia
Emma
Tania
Debra
Paula
Loretta
Anjelica
Nichola
Irritate
Aggravate
Calculate
Debilitate
Segregate
Vituperate
Radiate
Populate
Humiliate
Militate
Ding dong
Ping pong
Chitchat
Bang bang
Agar agar
Zigzag
Singsong
Ring a ding
Net net
Tintin
Do I know you?
Am I late?
Have time?
Wanna come in?
Going to where?
Are you sure?
Your name was
Did I wake you up?
Give me a kiss
Ready yet?
Clop clop
Bowwow
Miaow
Arf arf
Cluck cluck
Baa baa
Peep peep
Quack quack
Croak croak
Oink oink
Spare me some change
Buy me that car
Gimme gimme gimme
I need new clothes
Would you, please?
Please pay my rent
Treat me a dinner
Buy me some gadgets
Hand me your money
Put it on his credit
ALT
BOW
CO2
DVD
ESC
FBI
GNP
HOD
ILT
JFK
Life is hell
Boring as hell
My job is hell
Eating is hell
Living is hell
Short of savings
Got no hope
Nothing but time
Lack of aim
Can’t die either
Here’s some pork
Some more?
This is really good
Eat some beef, too
Have some miso soup
You’re not full yet
A wafer thin mint?
Chew your food well
Have some vegetables
Who’s paying for it?
Who is he?
Human being
Average
Looks young
Maybe too young
It’s alive
So cute
He’s my type
Murmur
I think he likes me
You found me
Gonna kill me?
Don’t shoot!
Hold on a sec
You rat!
Go ahead
Try and get me
Do whatever you want
Ouch!
What the heck
Wanna eat chicken
Chicken divan
Teriyaki chicken
Fried chicken
Deep fried chicken
Grilled chicken
BBQ chicken
Steamed chicken
Chicken cacciatore
Purchasable
Recyclable
Microwavable
Condensable
Squeezable
Nonperishable
Remarkable
Unutterable
Vegetable
On the table
Sugar!
Yikes
Wow
Oh no!
Now what?
Gee
Oh my!
Shoot
No way
Oops
Pineapple
Anchovy
Fresh tomato
Black olive
Italian sausage
Mushroom
Crispy bacon
Pepperoni
Double cheese
Mmm yummy
Insistent
Transparent
Persistent
Obedient
Godparent
Innocent
Despondent
Percipient
Superintendent
Travel agent
Heebie jeebies
Boogie woogie
Dingle dangle
Rumpy pumpy
Ticky tacky
Huggermugger
Only lonely
Razzle dazzle
Walkie talkie
Hustle bustle
Fascism
Terrorism
Mechanism
Biorhythm
Corporatism
Algorithm
Mannerism
Darwinism
Barbarism
Samba rhythm
Collective agreement
Deferred payment
Underdevelopment
Self improvement
Over employment
Foundation garment
Counterstatement
Bargain basement
Pronouncement
Sexual harassment
Mean
Babbler
Liar
Tightwad
Wimp
Greedy
Coward
Naive
Weakling
Grind
Fret
Insecure
Throbbing
Dizziness
Palsy
Headache
Undigested
Chill
Breathless
Spasm
Scuzzy
Muzzy
Crazy
Tizzy
Frenzy
Dizzy
Hazy
Zizzy
Snazzy
Doozy
Threshold
Reynold
Old gold
Marigold
Iron mold
Unsold
Overbold
Manifold
Not yet sold
I’m on hold
Barrel roll
Payroll
Muster roll
Logroll
Blanket roll
Toilet roll
Patent roll
Rock n roll
Carroll
Spring roll
Barracoon
Cameroon
Lagoon
Pantaloon
Monsoon
Baboon
Cocoon
Lampoon
Afternoon
Honeymoon
E mail
T shirt
G man
U boat
P wave
X rated
V neck
U turn
O boy
T bone steak
No way
Throwaway
Highway
Runaway
Stowaway
Gateway
Takeaway
Pathway
Broadway
Hemingway
Secondhand
Minute hand
Old hand
Glad hand
Dead hand
Master hand
Thirdhand
Stagehand
Invisible hand
Gimme a big hand
Radish
Potato skin
Chicken finger
Another radish
Onion ring
Nachos
More radish
Garlic toast
Assorted cheese
Check please
Animals
Turtles
Monkeys
Llamas
Wallabies
Octopi
Moose
Geese
Platypuses
Humans
Hansel and Gretel
Bonnie and Clyde
Jack and Jill
Sonic and Knuckles
Romeo and Juliet
Hamlet and York
Aladdin and lamp
Ahab and Moby Dick
Ham and Cheese
Salt and Pepper
Earthquakes
Tornadoes
Flash floods
Hurricanes
10 Car pileups
Avalanches
Swarm of locusts
Volcanoes
Nuclear Meltdown
Junior Prom
Attention
Dress right
Right face
Left face
About face
Forward march
On the double
Halt!
At ease
Get lost
Samurai
Geisha
Kamikaze
Harakiri
Sukiyaki
Banzai
Ninja
Fujiyama
Kimono
Sayonara
Venezuela
Guerrilla
Umbrella
Tarantula
Spatula
Vanilla
Peninsula
Gorilla
Salmonella
Cinderella
Tight
Cool
Fab
Phat
Wicked
Badass
Flash
Primo
A OK
Boss
Bare to dare
Dare to care
Care to wear
Wear to tear
Torn to shreds
Be so crude
In the nude
Shred it dude
Looking lewd
Bad attitude
Gore blimey
Its tiny
So shiny
Too cruel
And briny
Don’t complain
She’s whiny
Plain Jane
You’re a pain
Ball n chain
Embargo
Key Largo
No cargo
Escargo
Air cargo
Santiago
Fandango
Contango
Mandingo
Superego
Lost my keys
Stung like bees
On high seas
Ill at ease
Guts do seize
She do tease
Cut the cheese
Babe to squeeze
Girl to please
Social disease
Crap trancer
Lap glancer
Nap cancer
Zap cancer
Clap lancer
Trap answer
Wrap dancer
Gap dancer
Rap stancer
Neuromancer
Thomas Jefferson
Abraham Lincoln
George Washington
John F. Kennedy
Teddy Roosevelt
Andrew Jackson
John Quincy Adams
Ulysses S. Grant
Dwight D. Eisenhower
Hillary Clinton
Sociology
Optomology
Psychology
Entomology
Terminology
Bacteriology
Zoology
Chronology
Paleontology
Apology
Asparagus
Broccoli
Cabbage
Egg plant
Lettuce
Mushroom
Pumpkin
Squash
Turnip
No meat here
Time emit
Yam may
Drawer reward
Looter retool
Pupils slipup
Step pets
Repaid diaper
But tub
Cod doc
Naps span
Harpy
Cyclops
Medusa
Kraken
Pegasus
Gorgon
Sirens
Chimera
Minotaur
Hydra
Nickel
Dime
Penny
Cash
Gold
Bank
Fort Knox
Check
Dollars
Shopping spree
Bus
Taxi
Chopper
Plane
Limo
Sledge
Bike
Tricycle
Unicycle
Rickshaw
Daffodil
Snapdragon
Posie
Azalea
Begonia
Tulip
Orchid
Daisy
Sunflower
Flower Power
Capitalism
Nationalism
Socialism
Imperialism
Feudalism
Communism
Nepotism
Pointillism
Anachronism
Dadaism
Chemist
Marxist
Analyst
Harpist
Pianist
Sadist
Nudist
Artist
Typist
Bris
Elf
Ogre
Gnome
Dwarf
Fairy
Imp
Halfling
Orc
Dragon
Geek!
Sword
Quest
Knight
Horse
Search
Journey
Dragon
Battle
Struggle
Bodies
Brush your teeth
Comb your hair
Make your bed
Did you flush?
Watch your mouth
Eat your carrots
Clean your room
Do your homework
Wash your hands
I’m not your mother!
No way
Yes
Maybe
Dunno
Not sure
Yeah
Whatever
Okay
Never
Huh?
FTP
DNS
HTML
BBS
FAQ
POP
URL
TCP
HTTP
IOU
Brush
Comb
Mullet
Frizzy
Hairspray
Limp
Mousse
Crewcut
Pompadour
Split ends
Route
Lane
Terrace
Place
Court
Boulevard
Freeway
Highway
Drive
Roadkill
Weepy
Cry baby
Depressed
Glum
Morose
Pathetic
Screaming
Teary eyed
Upset
Just got dumped
Smart alec
Bad boy
Loud mouth
Fancy pants
Hoodlum
Little rascal
Spoiled brat
Tough pants
Ugly kid
Young punk
Fated
Kismet
Meant to be
Preordained
Happenstance
Circumstance
In the stars
Destiny
Just my luck
Cursed
Cha cha
Foxtrot
Jitterbug
Rumba
Mambo
Polka
Jive
Salsa
Tango
2 left feet
West side
Cased
Draft
Ferret
Grass
Racer
Sacred
Tread
Verse
Warts
Hippo
Kill
Junk
Lion
Knoll
Milk
Nuon
Oink
Poop
Yolk
Hill
Pill
Nil
Mill
Gill
Till
Dill
Sill
Will
Pterodactyl
Top row
Rope
Wrote
Yeti
Quit
Outer
Equip
Utter
Port
Irrupt
Morning star
Sword
Dagger
Longbow
Crossbow
Flail
Halberd
Glaive
Pole arm
Run and hide
Wensleydale
Gouda
Cheddar
Brie
Stilton
Danish Blue
Feta
Jarlsberg
American
Gorgonzola
Parrot
Cuckoo
Robin
Falcon
Eagle
Hawk
Vulture
Sea gull
Tern
Penguin
Prostate
Thyroid
Intestine
Duodenum
Kidney
Spleen
Cerebellum
Pancreas
Tongue
Esophagus
Raspberry
Strawberry
Loganberry
Blueberry
Mulberry
Cranberry
Gooseberry
Elderberry
Bayberry
Dingleberry
Nitric
Carbolic
Acetic
Oxalic
Lactic
Folic
Sulphuric
Nucleic
Carbonic
Gonna be sick
Autocracy
Theocracy
Democracy
Oligarchy
Communist
Monarchy
Republic
Anarchy
Dictatorship
Gynocracy
Flute
Trumpet
Oboe
Saxophone
French horn
Piccolo
Recorder
Tuba
Clarinet
Don’t blow it
Sonic the Hedgehog
Jet Grind Radio
Afterburner
Crazy Taxi
Sega Rally
Virtua Fighter
Typing of the Dead
House of the Dead
Space Harrier
OUTTRIGGER

All Typing of the Dead Lists: phrases, words, groups, 3+ characters, 2-letter words, full list

This list was generated from the Dreamcast version of Typing of the Dead. More details here.